we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
