Texts From Last Night

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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  If I go to jail what happens to my debt?

  (1-908): View more from New Jersey

  You dont have to pay it.

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  I'm going to jail.

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  (908): If I go to jail what happens to my debt? (1-908): You dont have to pay it. (908): I'm going to jail. http://tfl.nu/9by4
  Replies (2) Good night (1584) Bad night (583)
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  (772): View more from Florida

  I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.

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  (772): I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring. http://tfl.nu/9i68
  Replies (10) Good night (2286) Bad night (835)
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.

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  (502): I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party. http://tfl.nu/23sk
  Replies (17) Good night (1127) Bad night (4831)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.

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  (773): Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name. http://tfl.nu/27vq
  Replies (15) Good night (5638) Bad night (1826)
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  (575): View more from New Mexico

  I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.

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  (575): I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together. http://tfl.nu/r2dz
  Replies (19) Good night (5117) Bad night (1083)
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  (845): View more from New York

  Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.

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  (845): Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye. http://tfl.nu/5hfu
  Replies (20) Good night (1481) Bad night (2913)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.

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  (978): She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch. http://tfl.nu/wlr1
  Replies (6) Good night (690) Bad night (2008)
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  (305): View more from Florida

  New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'

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  (305): New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made' http://tfl.nu/jx5j
  Replies (1) Good night (1011) Bad night (676)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.

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  (978): The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty. http://tfl.nu/l80d
  Replies (10) Good night (2042) Bad night (545)
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  (312): View more from Illinois

  Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.

  (312): View more from Illinois

  Denial, avoidance and beer.

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  (312): Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013. (312): Denial, avoidance and beer. http://tfl.nu/o423
  Replies (3) Good night (1046) Bad night (423)
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.

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  (702): Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos. http://tfl.nu/ooli
  Replies (5) Good night (344) Bad night (631)
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  (574): View more from Indiana

  I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..

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  (574): I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today.. http://tfl.nu/121n
  Replies (20) Good night (1033) Bad night (870)
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  (562): View more from California

  I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!

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  (562): I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!! http://tfl.nu/mwf9
  Replies (3) Good night (804) Bad night (431)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS

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  (+44): GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS http://tfl.nu/090f
  Replies (1) Good night (502) Bad night (306)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes

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  (206): he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes http://tfl.nu/42iw
  Replies (0) Good night (605) Bad night (161)

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