Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Randomize