Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(586): View more from Michigan

I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane

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(586): I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane http://tfl.nu/vhwv

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(212): View more from New York

R you on birth control?

(1-212): View more from New York

No, why?

(212): View more from New York

...no reason

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(212): R you on birth control? (1-212): No, why? (212): ...no reason http://tfl.nu/zfov

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(805): View more from California

singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful

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(805): singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful http://tfl.nu/6f81

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(205): View more from Alabama

Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.

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(205): Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies. http://tfl.nu/26xq

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places

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(603): Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places http://tfl.nu/sf6j

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(740): View more from Ohio

His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.

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(740): His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them. http://tfl.nu/w51l

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(704): View more from North Carolina

She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock

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(704): She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock http://tfl.nu/w4aw

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(317): View more from Indiana

He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...

(1-317): View more from Indiana

He's the fucking cop whisperer.

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(317): He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him... (1-317): He's the fucking cop whisperer. http://tfl.nu/3vvt

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(402): View more from Nebraska

Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...

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(402): Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being... http://tfl.nu/xmjx

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.

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(+44): Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace. http://tfl.nu/pdfz

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(678): View more from Georgia

Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.

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(678): Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago. http://tfl.nu/b245

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.

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(978): rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home. http://tfl.nu/3qi1

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(307): View more from Wyoming

He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.

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(307): He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style. http://tfl.nu/qafz

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(410): View more from Maryland

It was a book called Gay Safari.

(443): View more from Maryland

I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.

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(410): It was a book called Gay Safari. (443): I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel. http://tfl.nu/jo6k

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(204): View more from Manitoba

NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.

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(204): NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees. http://tfl.nu/cysh

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