The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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