she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
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he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
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Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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