My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
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