I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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