Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
