Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
