Having a random hookup so left but love u
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
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