I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Randomize
