If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
