Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
