One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
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