i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
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There's always time for handjobs
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
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Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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