Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize