Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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