Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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