I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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