i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
Randomize