i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
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