that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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