No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
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Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
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A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
This can only be settled by a dance off.
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