how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize