The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
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I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
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Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody