what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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