sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
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