you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I want to make a zoo with you.
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
