I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
