just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
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