How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Randomize