I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize