I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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