Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
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I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.