is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize