I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
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