No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Come share oat with me in your robe
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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