We're facebook friends in real life
And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had to coat check the pizza.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
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