We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.