i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Watching her eat just hurts me
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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