How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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