Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize