so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.