i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
you would pick up someone in the library
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.