Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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