Kiss
Puke
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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