I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
