My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
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