you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
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